In the past I’ve never been particularly coordinated, although I love to dance (freestyle) and I enjoy being active and in my body. A few days ago I decided to support my newly integrated brain with the challenge of learning to juggle three balls. So, I ordered a set from Amazon and it arrived last night. Today, I put the balls to the test. So, what did I notice?
The first big thing I noticed was that I was calm and confident when I approached the task of learning to juggle. No anxiety about whether or not I could learn. No self-esteem issues around learning to juggle at all. Nice! I spent about 15 minutes practicing the one-ball toss, to anchor the feeling of tossing the ball from one hand to the other into my brain. Then I moved onto the two ball toss. That was harder, and after a half hour of practicing that I got to the point where I could juggle the two balls some of the time. I’ll be continuing with teaching myself to juggle over the coming days and weeks (if it takes that long). The goal is to juggle three balls.
So, what did I discover about myself in this exercise?
First, I found that I could do something very unfamiliar, something that feels awkward and not get at all flustered or frustrated. I dropped the balls so many times and felt great about it. I had fun! This is remarkable for me. In the past, most of my activities would be centered around the things that were comfortable and familiar to me. Now I’m pushing myself out of that comfort zone and having fun.
The second thing I learned is that I’m not horrible at juggling. Yeah, I drop the ball a lot, but I’m delighted at the number of times I succeeded in the two-ball juggle given how little time I’ve spent practicing it so far.
The third, and most important thing of all, is that I found, and am finding in all areas of my life now, that my self-esteem is not tied to how well I can do this juggling act!
Thank you Brain Integration!
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